Posted by Mongo Thursday, March 15, 2012
Here comes Mongo cotton tail, stomping down the bunny trail. Hippity-trippity-crash-fall-OW-bang-lid spinning on the ground faster and faster sound effect-boom!
That bunny trail looks like Beirut, now.
Anyway, all this silliness is for a reason. Angry Mongo’s Spring Giveaway!
That’s right. I’m having a Spring Giveaway and I’m just eggstatic about the prize basket.
We have a few items from the vault for you:
DVD of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971 version with Gene Wilder… not Johnny Depp)
Peep Show shirt in your size
Box of peeps
0.0 Non Runner Sticker (for all you who don’t feel like working off the candy you’ve consumed)
Lent Is For Quitters Magnet
And a couple of other surprises
Three ways to enter. Facebook, Twitter and on posting comments here.
1. Comment below telling me what's the best thing to find in your basket.
2. Tweet "I just entered the @AngryMongo Spring Giveaway for a chance to win some great prizes http://ow.ly/9IoD9 #MongoSpring2012"
3. Go to my facebook page and tell me what's the best thing to find in your basket.
Not so fine print. More like DAAAYAAAMMN Print:
If you are upset that I’m being an old fogey and including the Gene Wilder Willy Wonka version, then step off and recognize, biyatch! Gene Wilder IS Willy Wonka. Johnny Depp is Mad Hatter in training from that role. Really, go back and watch Gene Wilder. Yeah, Roald Dahl hated that version but man, Gene Wilder rocked. Where was I? Oh yeah, only one entry, per method. Your odds do not increase. It’s random, duh! If you enter more than once on any given method, I will only take the first entry. It looks sad and we all laugh and you cry and we lick up the tears and cherish the sweet, sweet taste of your fail. If you have an aversion to candy, holidays, or humor aimed at certain groups… do not enter. If you have the dia-beet-us, contact Liberty Medical. They’ll send you a box. If you have what my father-in-law calls “Sugar”, can I borrow a cup? Seriously, why do people say “He has sugar.”? We all have sugar. I have regular sugar, brown sugar, confectioners’ sugar, and even Splenda. People who have diabetes have diabetes. Let’s stop saying, “They got sugar.” or “They got the cancer.” That’s like saying THE Ohio State University with a long E. You’re putting too much em-PHA-sis on the wrong Syl-LAB-le. But even if you have cancer, you should enter. It won’t increase your chances but hey, silver lining, right? Am I being too much of a prick… or not enough?