Sports Tees For The Not So Major Leaguer

Posted by Mongo Friday, July 30, 2010

Sports tees are always in fashion.  The NFL, NHL, MLB, NBA, and a host of other alphabet soup organizations derive much of their profits from licensed apparel emblazoned with the logos of teams in their leagues.  And while it’s always expensive to go out and buy authentic looking shirts and hats there is still a market for off brands and nondescript merchandise.  You can find shirts in Walmart that say “ALLSTAR” or “CHAMP” or any other generic sports themed gear for your sports nut, but admittedly, it’s not quite the same.

Well, what if you aren’t into traditional sports?  What if you aren’t the king of the gridiron or assassin of the court?  What if the best thing you were good at in school was, say, nukem?   We’re not even talking about traditional volleyball.  We’re talking about the game where you catch the ball and then throw it over the net.  That’s why Mongo Angry! Mongo Smash! wants to recognize the gym class hero and playground phenom in all of us with these designs. 

Kickball Champ

Get Kickball Champ at CafePress, Zazzle, and Skreened

If you didn’t get picked last on the playground you must have a pretty decent leg.  Great punters and place kickers have to start somewhere.  Might as well be the one who can kick that big red rubber ball past the dumpster.


Dodgeball King

Get Dodgeball King at CafePress, Zazzle, and Skreened
 
If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.  That piece of advice from Patches O'Houlihan is essential along with Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive and... Dodge.   And while you’re at it, catch the damn thing and get your team back on the court.

Scooter Soccer Star

Get Scooter Soccer Star at CafePress, Zazzle, and Skreened

With the World Cup and the drone of the Vuvuzelas safely in the rearview mirror for a bit, it’s time to start searching for the next superstar of the field.  What better way to show your athletic prowess than to advertise that, in grade school, you were the king of the multipurpose room that doubled as a cafeteria, auditorium, and gym class.  While your sensory skills in determining who was picking you in Thumbs Up Seven Up is in line with The Medium, your ability to scoot yourself down the linoleum and make a goal in Scooter Soccer was nothing short of David Beckham on a good day.



All State Paper Football

Get All State Paper Football at CafePress, Zazzle, and Skreened

On the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field,  football legends were separated from mere mortals.  The grid iron is a place to crush your opponent’s will and body as you march down the field towards destiny.  However, if you can’t run, hit, kick, or catch, you can still be an All American in Study Hall by correctly folding a piece of paper.  Don’t laugh, the ability to adjust your game for table top grain is indeed a valuable skill to be had.


Lawn Dart Champion

Get Lawn Dart Champ at CafePress, Zazzle, and Skreened

Kids are wimps these days.  What do they know about the rough and tumble world of previous generations’ backyard games.  In my youth, we threw huge darts at each other and never moved as we waited to see who could make it inside the ring at our feet.   Then someone had to go and ban the game of Lawn Darts.  I tell you, those were the days of wrought iron metal jungle gyms, hanging over concrete playgrounds, and slides with reflective metal that made for the equivalent of a cheese grater on the back of your legs as you slid down in the hot sun.  Soft molded plastic and recycled tennis shoe rubber have made our kids weaklings.


There you are, sport tees for all us recess superstars.

If you want to learn how to achieve the faded or vintage look for these designs follow the links below.

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